On May 16 I stepped out into the waiting area of Dublin airport. I immediately saw Alan and Ruth, I took a deep breath and thought, “I’m home!” Besides being with my immediate family, I have never been as comfortable in a place as I am in Abbey.
This summer I learned so much about myself, about Ireland, and about Abbey.
You know what I love about Abbey? The people! You all make the place so special. Yes the building is pretty amazing and I love it, but that’s not what makes a home. I come in and see smiling faces that brightens the whole place up! You want to see me and care about me. It’s amazing how certain ones of you know me so well that you can see what my mood is for that day and ask me seriously how I am doing. You are real friends. I love how Abbey is so diverse. That is what makes Abbey so special and it makes me think of what Heaven will look like. People from all tongues and tribes will praise His name.
Right now I’m sitting in my house wondering what I’m doing in life. I’m only 25, but for a 25 year old it seems like I should have some sort of direction. I decided to turn off my tv and read the Bible. I haven’t really been in my daily routine, or rather, I haven’t really been enjoying my daily routine of reading the Bible. So I put on my headphones to focus better, because music always helps me think better. God spoke to me through one of songs I was listening to. I do believe that God has unique ways of talking to us. It’s a song that I have never really thought much about, until God put the words in my ears. Here are the lyrics:
“The same old stuff I have to do.
Over and over and over and over again each day it seems.
Nothing great to show off my abilities and my worth.
So show me my purpose in the midst of this routine.
Because I am trying to understand why I am here at all.
There’s so many guesses and too many simple answers.
Could it be that life is not what I think at all?
It’s not the big things but the ordinary in between
And maybe this is not the time to be waiting for any better reason to be glad
that I’m alive at all.
So help me take each day each simple thing that I must do
to bring glory to You.
And I could search out a lot of ways to keep me doing things
and attempt to make my mark,
Then maybe I miss the mark for Your desire for me.
And I will trust in You in everything I do. And do it as for You.
And I am learning to understand why I am here at all.
There’s no need for guesses when You are the simple answer.
You show me that life is not what I think at all,
It’s not the big things but the ordinary in between.
Maybe this is not the time at all to be waiting for
any better reason to be glad at all.
So help me take each day each simple thing that I must do
to bring glory to You.”
I have been questioning my life and what I’m doing. While Starbucks is a great place to work and I love my coworkers and customers, it’s lost its excitement and I’m ready to move on to my next “adventure” in life. I’ve thought about being an English teacher in Korea, wouldn’t that be exciting? Or being a photographer for National Geographic, a pilot, a flight attendant, archeologist, a CSI, detective, spy, CIA, or a missionary to some unknown indigenous tribe in South America where the people are known for their hatred and violence and leading them all to Christ. Maybe I’ll be one of those someday, highly unlikely, but the question is, “Where is my heart in all this?” Am I really seeking out what God wants for me in life or am I seeking out adventure. Partly the reason for my restlessness is that I just don’t feel at home here in Nashville, probably because I have not given it time; but also, I have not been enjoying the simple things that God is putting in my life.
Most importantly I have not been truly loving the people God has been putting in my life. I mean, how am I expected to lead a tribe to Christ if I am not loving those that God is placing right before my eyes. Lately, I have been desiring a good community of believers. One of the first nights I was in Nashville I had a dream of a small community of believers sitting together in the living room playing and singing for hours praising our God. I still have that longing, but it won’t happen overnight. I have a problem of holding back and not giving the love I know that I can give towards others. I should be willing to embrace Christians and shower them with love because we believe in the same God! I struggle with getting close to people, but God does not call us to walk alone! He calls us to have fellowship and that doesn’t mean a simple “Hi, how are you doing?” It’s a deep embrace, prayers for each other, loving others and having a desire to see them and know them better!
I have made a home in Dublin and at Abbey. I have wondered and questioned God why I must leave my home. The only answer I know is that here on earth I have no home. I will never be “home” on earth because my home is not in Mississippi, Dublin, or Tennessee. It’s in Heaven. It’s in the Body of Believers. That is where I feel most at home.
My prayer for Abbey is that there would be community. That the community we feel and have at Ovoca would be conveyed throughout the year. That we would not long to go to Ovoca once a year, but we would long to go to church once a week, and more!! The Lord is our Saviour!!! We rejoice in that common bond!!
So, where is home? Home is in the Body of Christ. “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 15: 34
